Author: GuadyG

My name is Guadalupe Macias but you can call me Guady. I am 51 yrs fabulous and mother to a budding 22 year old actress. I am a physician with a passion for writing that was sparked when I was 9 yrs old and my 2nd grade teacher gave the assignment to write a poem. My blogs are about various topics but all connected with the thread of love. Love for the arts, self-love, love for life, love of nature, love of the flesh and love that’s goes beyond this realm. Why? Because of love.

Your Hand

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As I hold your hand in mine, I keep wondering who had their hand in yours before me. I fear for the future because my hand might not always be in yours. I then stop my mind from so much thinking. STOP!!

Why should I dwell on the past of which I was not a part of or on the future which has yet come to fruition?

I am happy for this moment RIGHT NOW! I am grateful for this moment RIGHT NOW! YOUR HAND IS IN MINE AND MY HAND IS IN YOURS! I will cultivate this union, this bond and I will treasure this ……

I shall let the past disintegrate into oblivion, those other hands won’t matter ANY MORE! I will love you until the future is no longer a threat to this moment and to this happiness–OUR HAPPINESS!

I choose TO LIVE each moment. I choose TO LOVE each and every second until I am living the future. FOR I LOVE YOU AND I WILL NOT BE AFRAID!

How may times do we let love slip away because of our fears? It seems there aren’t that many good people out there anymore. But there are because we are! Right here! Right now! Right?

Moment as defined by American Heritage Dictionary
1.Brief interval of time
2.Specific point in time
3.Particular period of importance or excellence
4.Importance

One word. Four definitions. One us. Many aspects. All important. All loving and living this moment right now!! TIME!! ENDLESS!!

Signing off
Guady G
Hugs from Brooklyn

Singer

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Dear beautiful Singer

I woke up this morning thinking about you. You seem so exhausted. You are so worn out.  I know it’s because you’ve worked countless years. It finally has caught up with you.

You never stopped performing your craft. You were busy at it even throughout the weary nights. You sang with pride while others lay in slumber. You were loud and although we wanted to drown you out with pillows over our heads you kept on making your sound. You loved to sing.

You never used exhaustion as an excuse to perform your duty as a singer. So today I will pay you homage. You helped not only me but countless others.

Because of you 5 of us were able to go to catholic school. It was your nonstop dedication that provided me with my prom dress and all my semi-formal dresses in college. You clothed me. You were a relentless force for you served many purposes.

You held my food but mostly my mother’s. You let us sit on your lap so often without ever complaining. We did our homework with you and you let us use your ruler— all 36 inches of it. You never faltered.

Day in and day out you were pressed and you sang. Sometimes you sang in unison but mostly you sang alone. Your song wasn’t ever appreciated for it hurt our ears and gave us headaches. You never quit working and singing. You had a mission to provide for my family and you did it well.

My sweet singer you aren’t heard that much anymore for you are too old and too rusty. Your pedals get stuck and you are dusty. Very rarely I hear you singing but now I appreciate you. I miss your sound for it was the sound of my youth. Thank you Singer thank you.

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Shout out goes to my mother, señora Gladys, Comadre Isabel and all those that used the Singer machine to provide for their families. They never stopped working because they loved us so much. They hurt their backs and their knees so we wouldn’t when we got older. Their love for us was unwavering and The SINGER  kept singing it’s song.

Thank you Singer Model AS-4002

Signing off
Guady G
Hugs from Brooklyn

THE CRAWL

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pexels-photo-325693.jpegJust crawl, crawl, crawl until you get stronger and can stand tall
Crawl and crawl and crawl but watch out for the wall.
Keep it moving. Keep improving but all the while keep it grooving!

Enjoy every pointed corner you must turn for they are there for you to learn.
Learn the lesson be it good or bad. But don’t let it get you too sad or mad.
Keep the love flowing and know you are growing.
Enduring, knowing and finally glowing.

DON’T DOUBT YOURSELF! KEEP ON GOING! YOU WILL STAND TALL AGAINST ANY WALL!!

Signing off,
Guady G
Hugs from Brooklyn

THE MIRROR!!

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Who are you to tell me no when I’m full of woe and I need to go?
Who are you to tell me no when I want to know so I can grow?
Who are you to stop my glow? My glow!!!…. MY GLOW!!

Please STOP saying no is no?

I shatter the mirror and I shout yes I must now go for I want to grow!!!
You can no longer stop me! I know now what I must know!!
You can no longer scare me! I am ready and I will glow!

DON’T EVER LIMIT YOUR GROWTH BY DOUBTING YOUR GREATNESS!
SHATTER YOUR MIRROR!! LET YOURSELF FINALLY GLOW!!

Signing off Guady G
Hugs from Brooklyn

I love you

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You are probably wondering who this blog will be about? Hmm. I want to start by saying it again. I love you.

Why do I love you? I love you because you have always been with me. I love you Guady G and the G stands for Great or Gorgeous. It has taken me 50 years to realize how freaking awesome I am. Have I become boastful? Do I have an inflated ego? No and no. I  finally realized that I don’t need external validation to make me feel loved or beautiful. I really love myself. Do you love yourself?

It wasn’t always this way for me. Growing up as a shy individual and being smart were a perfect combination to be prey for a bully.   Each time I was picked on it hurt and I internalized it. I believed it.  I was once told by a girl at age 9 that I should become a nun because only God would love me. She said I was too ugly for anyone else to love me.  I cried every night before I went to bed praying for a different face, asking the Gods to make me dumber so that I could be liked. I just wanted a friend and someone to love me.

The teacher would make me stand in front of the classroom and state “Guadalupe got another A and I’m proud of her”.  I felt all the sneers and I just wish I had the guts back then to tell her to please stop. School was a nightmare for me but my home was nice. My mother’s arms my haven. She would tell me I was beautiful and she loved me.  I was happy at home but school was another thing.

I was content when I graduated from grammar school. High School would be different I thought but it wasn’t . Less bullying but still no boys liking me until I met Ricky Lopez in the 9th grade.  He said I was beautiful, sweet and nice. I was confused he would say these things to me because he was blind. He couldn’t see me! How could he know anything? I thanked him but on a deeper level I didn’t believe him.

For my senior prom I went with my friend -a girl.  Ray my classmate said we would go together and it was only a practical joke. Not funny but painful.  Why didn’t he think I was pretty? That girl in grammer school was right–I should become a nun.  Thank God I didn’t because I love the male gender.

These are just a few stories of my evolving to where I am now. Something started to click in my mid thirties. Perhaps all those self-help books and free therapy sessions from my eldest sister were finally sinking in.  It has been a journey but I finally understand what Ricky told me back then. I understand it fully at age 50. Took a long time but I’m here.

It’s about my essence and it’s about true love. Love should not be based on someone’s face, the size of their wallet or the external validation they are giving you. Its about their essence. Love their true essence and they are beautiful just like I was to Ricky.  It’s about your essence so love yourself.

Put downs, bullying, and sneers no longer work on me. They are just words without any significance to me today.

Signing off Guady G

Hugs from Brooklyn