Tag: depression

I’m Free

GuadyGLeave a comment

I was full of hope walking the high tightrope when I lost my balance and fell. No one heard me yell out for help not even you.

I found myself hopeless and alone. I kept asking the shadow cast on the wall to pull me up. Finally I put my arm back down. It was numb just like my broken legs.

Would I just rot and my dust be taken away by the wind? Who would know I ever existed?

You? You the one that abandoned me after telling me I could fly high?

You? You the one that said you would care for me if I fell?

You? You the one that clipped my wings when I wasn’t aware?

I trusted you but I was foolish to do so.

But my fate will not be sealed by your jealousy and hatred of me.

I will muster all my inner strength and crawl on my numb broken limbs. I shall escape this mental cage you put me in. I will fly again too except this time you won’t be able to catch me for I will be free.

You can still. . .

GuadyGLeave a comment

When someone blows you at the knees to prevent you from standing show them you can still crawl.

When they saw off your extremities to prevent you from moving show them you can still slither using your chin to propel you forwards. Keep moving!

If they remove your tongue to stop you from speaking your truths, know that you can still think your own thoughts. Keep thinking!

Even if they tell others to stop speaking your name, to forget you ever existed they will not succeed. You are unforgettable baby!

You are an amazing human being and they and they can all go . . . ..

Never let anyone dim your light! Keep shining brightly. Keep moving! The future is yours. Plan for it.

With all my love
Guady G

Please share if you like this. Thank you for taking out time to read and follow my blog. Muah.

No More!

GuadyGLeave a comment

I thought you had truly changed. Silly me! I guess I’m deranged. You are still the same and I the fool to blame.

I hate you, I loathe you oh I still love you.

You’re an ass. You are crass. This time I think I’ll pass. I don’t need you anymore. I chose you to ignore. I will rip you from my core. There’s an entire world to explore!

So this time I will walk away. There’s nothing left to say. Tomorrow is a new day. I might be sad and perhaps a bit mad but deep inside, I am glad.

I choose to let you be engrossed in your own stupidity. One day you will see, how your life unfolds without me.

So go away! Leave me now. You don’t deserve me for you broke our vows.

Time to let go of the past and move forward. You matter! You are wonderful.

With all my love Guady G
Hugs from Brooklyn

Ahh to be free. . .

GuadyGLeave a comment

Who am I if I can’t please you?
Who am I if I feel no pleasure?
I’ve become numb, quite dumb to have forgoten that you were rotten! I’m a treasure not here at your disposal! Not here for just your pleasure! I chose to feel and to turn the wheel cause I’m going far! Far away from you! No more turning back for you to direct me. I chose to be free! I know I’ll be okay, cause I’ve got me!!

Story inspired by a brave individual!

Have a great weekend. Hugs from Brooklyn
Guady G

Mind Gone

GuadyGLeave a comment
woman s index finger on her lips
Photo by Mochammad Algi on Pexels.com

I lay here numb staring at the ceiling thinking about this f-upped year! I don’t know if I’m happy or sad or anything anymore! I want someone to blame for the sh….t but what would that make me?  A lame victim?   A powerless mofo who can’t even flip a switch on?  Yes. I had a choice. Yes. I could have taken the stairs instead of the elevators. But I was lazy! So lazy I told you to do it and it cost you your life. But you aren’t gone cause you are still very much here. You are in my head and so very much in my field of vision. I hate you every time I look in the mirror!  You said some hurtful things to me! You used people I loved. Them and yourself, yourself, yourself!  Nobody knows all about you cause you are dark and wretched. You are someone I desire so much because I can’t attain you!  Who are you but the ideas that were outlined for you since you were born?  You wanted to run and they told you to walk.  You wanted to laugh and they said be quiet!  Shhh!  So many shhhhhhhhs! Now you don’t even know which thoughts are yours or theirs!  Have you gone insane? Have I?  Is this all part of a good read?  Fantasy?  Who decides? Real? Fake? I’ll never tell.

Well, it’s now the end of the year.  Is it time to dwell on all the crap of 2019?  Time to fantasize about 2020?   It’s your choice!  It is plenty.  Tell all those voices in your head to shut the hell up and yes it’s all you. Breathe, Relax and just take one day at a time! Stop ranting! No more chit chatter.  The crappy past is over and it doesn’t matter.  You are powerful and always have a choice. Making no choice is also a choice. I wish you all Happy writing and Happy New Year.

Let’s see what great things like ahead for all of us. I love you all. I send you hugs from Brooklyn.  You are powerful and you will always matter. Loved ones are never truly gone for they watch over us. 2020 is a new beginning. Don’t make it your end. You have the power and the strength to climb all those stairs. You don’t need crutches or elevators. You can do it. Just believe and trust in yourself and in the universe.

With Love
Guady G